Your Boss Is Not Your Friend

We spend so much time at work, it's natural to become friends with your co-workers. If you follow any popular media, any office situation, no matter how initially dysfunctional, eventually becomes not just friends, but family. This is understandable, but becomes dangerous when applied to anyone who makes decisions about your career. This talk reviews the dangers of thinking of your boss as your friend, including the inherent conflict of interests that arise.

More broadly, this talk discusses how to maintain a professional relationship with your manager, showing how to keep enough emotional distance to protect yourself when decisions go against you. It also includes strategies for determining when to voice your displeasure, and how to do it in a productive way that does not damage the relationship.

About Kenneth Kousen

Ken Kousen is a Java Champion, several time JavaOne Rock Star, and a Grails Rock Star. He is the author of the Pragmatic Library books “Mockito Made Clear” and “Help Your Boss Help You,” the O'Reilly books “Kotlin Cookbook”, “Modern Java Recipes”, and “Gradle Recipes for Android”, and the Manning book “Making Java Groovy”. He also has recorded over a dozen video courses for the O'Reilly Learning Platform, covering topics related to Android, Spring, Java, Groovy, Grails, and Gradle.

His academic background include BS degrees in Mechanical Engineering and Mathematics from M.I.T., an MA and Ph.D. in Aerospace Engineering from Princeton, and an MS in Computer Science from R.P.I. He is currently President of Kousen IT, Inc., based in Connecticut.

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