How Not to Win Friends and Influence People - No Fluff Just Stuff

How Not to Win Friends and Influence People

Posted by: Johanna Rothman on November 25, 2009

I receive a number of please-link-to-me requests each week. Some are for products, some are for random sites. I received one a couple of weeks ago and decided not to respond because I wasn’t going to accept the link request. I received another request, this time with a please respond with an “aye or nay”. I replied “no.” I thought I was being helpful.

Apparently not.

I received another email from the requestor telling me “We had sent you a business proposition. Your response to it is curt, rude, unprofessional and uncalled for. This “discussion” is over. Thank you for nothing.”

You betcha. Except now I remember the product’s name and I will remember to tell people, if they ask me, whether they should do business with these people. Nope.

I certainly see how a negative one-word reply could be seen as curt. Except, they asked me for it! Oh well.

Do be careful about what you ask for. You might just get it.

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Johanna Rothman

About Johanna Rothman

Johanna Rothman, known as the “Pragmatic Manager,” offers frank advice for your tough problems. She helps leaders and teams learn to see simple and reasonable things that might work. Equipped with that knowledge, they can decide how to adapt their product development.

With her trademark practicality and humor, Johanna is the author of 18 books about many aspects of product development. She’s written these books:

  • Project Lifecycles: How to Reduce Risks, Release Successful Products, and Increase Agility
  • Become a Successful Independent Consultant
  • Free Your Inner Nonfiction Writer
  • Modern Management Made Easy series: Practical Ways to Manage Yourself; Practical Ways to Lead and Serve (Manage) Others; Practical Ways to Lead an Innovative Organization
  • Write a Conference Proposal the Conference Wants and Accepts
  • From Chaos to Successful Distributed Agile Teams (with Mark Kilby)
  • Create Your Successful Agile Project: Collaborate, Measure, Estimate, Deliver
  • Agile and Lean Program Management: Scaling Collaboration Across the Organization
  • Manage Your Project Portfolio: Increase Your Capacity and Finish More Projects, 2nd edition
  • Project Portfolio Tips: Twelve Ideas for Focusing on the Work You Need to Start & Finish
  • Diving for Hidden Treasures: Finding the Value in Your Project Portfolio (with Jutta Eckstein)
  • Predicting the Unpredictable: Pragmatic Approaches to Estimating Project Schedule or Cost
  • Manage Your Job Search
  • Hiring Geeks That Fit
  • The 2008 Jolt Productivity award-winning Manage It! Your Guide to Modern, Pragmatic Project Management
  • Behind Closed Doors: Secrets of Great Management (with Esther Derby)

In addition to articles and columns on various sites, Johanna writes the Managing Product Development blog on her website, jrothman.com, as well as a personal blog on createadaptablelife.com.

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